I hate clowns and always will

Like many people, I don’t like clowns. To me they are another species of warm-blooded creatures. I can’t even look into their eyes. It is such a mystery to me why someone would want to be a clown. Are they really trying to make people happy and laugh? Shit, most kids scream when they see one of these freaks.  Ronald McDonald is one of those monsters.

I have to disagree with the anti capitalist activists at the Boston-based Corporate Accountability International who demanded that McDonald’s stop marketing junk food to children.  They claim that because of Ronald and the happy meal toys that there is a rise of health conditions like diabetes and heart disease.

Just to set the story straight, I don’t frequent McDonald’s.  I grew up with that iconic zombie-like freak.   As a kid it was the mere fact that it was a place where all the other kids were going and they had flat hamburgers.  I remember seeing Ronald on occasion visiting some of the restaurants and scaring the shit out of little kids.  It’s not him that is responsible for fat kids and their health issues, it’s the lazy parents who cut corners and use the place to shut their kids up.  Why attack the clown because of lazy parents who are probably fat and unhealthy as well.  If anything, Ronald is probably trying to say “don’t eat this shit or this will happen to you”.

We need to stop big brother from spoiling our fun and freedom.  We can’t have the government telling us how and where to feed our kids.  It’s all about individual responsibility.  Aside from their creepy clown Ronald, McDonalds is one of the most charitable corporations in the world.  They have bent over backwards to change their menus to show the world they really do care.  On the flip-side, I don’t really think they care that their icon sends kids to bed with palpitating little hearts, bed-wetting and nightmares.

What’s next on the whinny Corporate Accountability International’s agenda? Are they going demand the government force the removal of hooters from Hooters because the hot wings may cause erections and the hardening of an artery?  Why don’t they take braille off of the drive through bank ATM’s.  Isn’t that sending a fucking message to blind people that they could drive?

My point being that though businesses have logos and icons, it is the individual’s responsibility for their own eating habits and health.  This sends a clear message that without government intervention, we would all kill ourselves while aimlessly walking the streets following clowns who’s sole purpose it is to fatten up our children.  I sure hope that McDonald’s doesn’t give in more than they already have.  They are an American success story.